Julia (celestialjules) wrote in switchspace,
Julia
celestialjules
switchspace

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help...?

Hello everyone.. I'm new to this community and to the idea of switching. I've always considered myself a sub/slave and am in a relationship right now were I am formally submitted to a wonderful Dom whom I am falling helplessly in love with. He enjoys all aspects of the lifestyle and in the past has submitted, formally, to a Mistress. 

Recently he has started thinking about finding a Mistress to submit to because he misses that aspect of the lifestyle... he assures me that it would have no impact on our relationship and that I would not be required to submit to any Mistress he would submit to. The two relationships would be unconnected completely. I admittedly do not like this idea at all. To me this relationship is so intimate and in my mind more so for me because I am the sub.. I don't like to think of him feeling the way I feel about him about some other women. He has listened to my concerns and taken them into account and as of yet has not even started looking for a MIstress because he knows I would have a hard time with it. 

He has asked me if I woudl be willig to try to Top him... assuring me that he would still be my Dom and I would still be te sub but that he would Dom from the bottom... essentailly Topping from the bottom for a scene everyonce and a while. I must admit that I curious about this, I don't know if I have the.... balls so to speak to actually Top him... I would have no idea were to begin... no idea what to do to him while in that scene. 

Then there are several concerns I have... I wonder if me Topping him on occasion would change the dynamic of our current relationship... so I'm asking the only place I can think to ask... do you fine in your relationship in which you both swirch for a given sence that you tend to see your partner as less of a Dom... or a sub because they switch on occasion... 

Also how do you make sure you don't end up comepeting to see who can be the better top... or bottom. 

And do you ever 'get back' at your partner for what they may have done to you while you were being the bottom... I think I would find myself thinking... 'do i really want to do this to him... what if he wants to get even at me later for it?"

Any advice on how I can go into this would be wonderful and welcome... 

I'm at the point were I would do anything for him.... even trying to top him in order to make him happy... so while he would be topping form the bottom I think I would be bottoming from the top.... i think. 

Confused~ Julia
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